First Things First

First Things First.  This is a timeless business principle I learned early in my career.  When dealing with angry patients or customers consider these steps to guide you.

First: Take care of you. Professionals who live balanced lives, control stress and worry and develop their leadership through emotional intelligence will have a higher success rate dealing with difficult people.

Second: Give people grace. You never know what they have been through and people already have three strikes against them (#1 Pain/Issues from illness, injury or issue, #2 Stress or worry, #3 Pressure financially, personally, or professionally) Added bonus?  They may be terminally unique from the very beginning…

Third: Follow these principles to successfully deal with angry people on phone calls. Go the extra step and practice saying examples out loud or roleplaying these statements to increase your comfort level with the new approaches.

• Listen fully: Your attention needs to be 100% focused on the person and what they are saying.  Avoid multitasking and be present in the moment.

• Use their name: Address the caller by name to build a personal connection.

• Lower your voice: Speak in a soft, steady, and slow voice to naturally encourage the caller to quiet down.

• Show empathy: Acknowledge their feelings by saying things like, “I understand or see how this is a frustrating situation for you.”

• Apologize sincerely: Offer an apology for their negative experience or inconvenience, even if it is not your direct fault. Avoid, “I’m sorry.”

• Focus on solutions: Shift the conversation away from past errors and toward what you can do right now. Help the person see the future resolution.

• Avoid trigger words: Never tell an angry person to “calm down,” as this usually makes them more upset. Instead choose phrases like, “I can see this has upset you. I understand how frustrating that may have been. Thank you for sharing how the experience made you feel.”

• Set firm limits: If the caller uses profanity or abusive language, calmly state that you want to help, but they must speak respectfully. “John, I want to help you and ask that you speak in a lower volume so I can focus on helping you.”

• End the call if needed: If the abuse continues after a warning, politely inform them that you are ending the call and will pass the issue to a manager or provider. “John, it appears that this situation has upset you greatly and I will need to end the call now and ask my manager to help resolve your issue.”

Active listening, showing empathy, problem solving and setting boundaries are the four key areas to effectively handle angry client (or family!) phone calls.  Remember to stay calm, let the caller vent without interruption, and use key listening skills with an even tone of voice to communicate. Never take the anger personally, as the frustration usually stems from the situation or fear rather than you. Be mindful to take care of yourself so you can properly take care of others. You can be a catalyst for positive, purposeful change when dealing with difficult people. Make every day count!

Blessings,

Merikay